


Surf, Meet Turf

by TheEeveeTamer



Category: Fire Emblem: If | Fire Emblem: Fates
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Except for Xander, Fluff, M/M, Meet the Family, Protective Older Brothers, Ryoma Has an Overactive Imagination, Takumi Has Bad Taste in Men
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-26
Updated: 2019-01-26
Packaged: 2019-10-16 09:31:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,929
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17547107
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheEeveeTamer/pseuds/TheEeveeTamer
Summary: His little brother has an unfortunate history with dating. As an older brother it would always be Ryoma's job to set those guys straight.





	Surf, Meet Turf

**Author's Note:**

> Haha do you remember when the games first came out and everyone associated Xander with steak for some reason! And then... You know Ryoma is like a lobster so... Surf'n'Turf? Get it? Fuck it nevermind I know I'm lame.
> 
> Anyways I'm trying to branch out a little, and Markumi is a woefully underappreciated ship. So woefully underappreciated that I don't even know if that's their ship name, it's just what I'm going with okay.

He almost didn’t catch his phone ringing, but when he finally picked it up he was met with the  _ incoming call  _ screen and the beaming expression of his younger brother from the last time they’d gone to the beach as a family. He swore, it was the only time they could get Takumi to smile.

“Hey, what’s going on?” This could either be good news or bad news, but they’d had a string of bad news so he was  _ hoping  _ it was good.

_ “So, I wanted to know if you would come over for dinner on Friday?” _

That was his little brother alright. Straight to the point.

“Dinner? What’s the occasion?”

_ “... Well, I got a new boyfriend and I really want you to meet him…” _

So it was bad news. Definitely bad news.

“No.”

_ “Come on Ryoma!” _

“Absolutely not. No.”

_ “I’m sure you’d like him if you just met him!” _

“That’s what you said about the last one. And the one before that. And the one before  _ that.” _

_ “Well this one is different!” _

“Face it little brother, you have horrible taste in men.”

He could practically hear the defiant pout through the phone. Even just  _ imagining  _ the expression on his little brother’s face did horrible things to his resolve.

_ “Fine, maybe some of them were mistakes! But I’m older now! Come on! Just come over for dinner. It’s really important to me that you like him.” _

“... Fine, I’ll do it for you.”

_ But don’t expect me to be happy about it.  _ He added silently in his head.

_ “Great! Be at my place around six on Friday?” _

“Of course. I’ll see you then.”

* * *

 

 

He arrived at the apartment little earlier than they’d agreed on, around 5:45, but Takumi did say  _ around  _ six. He fumbled for a moment with his key ring until he found the appropriate one and let himself in.

Takumi was fresh out of college, so his apartment wasn’t much to look at. Just a little one bedroom thing in a not-so-great part of town, so Ryoma came by often to check on him. Hence the key. Pretty much the entire apartment could be seen from the doorway. There was a little living room area off to the left and the kitchen straight ahead.

There wasn’t much furniture in the place, given that Takumi’s last loser of a boyfriend had stolen pretty much everything that wasn’t nailed down before breaking his little brother’s heart. He’d only left the bed and the couch, since those were presumably too heavy for him to drag out on his own before Takumi got home from work. His brother had slowly been replacing things, but on a starting teacher’s salary he could only afford to buy a thing or two at a time. He’d replaced most of the cookware, flatware, and the TV and coffee table, but he still had a regular card table and some metal folding chairs set up in the dining area.

He still needed to hunt that guy down, now that he thought about it.

He wasn’t sure what he was expecting when he walked through that door… Takumi had dated all kinds of guys from stoner burnouts to college dropouts to a  _ literal drug dealer  _ one time, so really he was bracing himself for the worst. But he was certainly  _ not  _ expecting to see his little brother sitting on the kitchen counter with a tall blonde man standing between his legs. Oh and the man was wearing  _ nothing but a towel. _ They hadn’t noticed him yet, he could still slip out and they could still save face... Takumi was too busy running his fingers through the guy’s curly blonde hair and shoving his tongue down his throat to pay any attention to him… Gods, this man had to be  _ at least  _ five years his senior.

Ryoma grabbed the door and slammed it behind him to get their attention. Takumi jumped and immediately pushed the guy away.

“Big brother! Uhm, this is--”

He recognized him immediately. He’d never forget that stupid, smug scowl. If he had a dollar for every time he wanted to punch this guy in the face then he’d have enough money to bail all of Takumi’s exes out of jail.

“Xander.” He finished for him. Takumi’s eyes went wide.

“How did you know that?”

“We went to high school together!” So he’d been right about the age difference. He supposed Takumi wouldn’t know that they’d been bitter rivals, since his little brother was too young to go to high school at the same time as them.

“Erm… Well this is rather awkward.” The taller man adjusted the towel around his waist. It had been slipping a bit, exposing the prominent jut of his hip bone. “I suppose I’ll go get dressed then?”

The blonde retreated into the bedroom and shut the door. He grabbed Takumi by the elbow and drew him into the living room in the hopes that Xander wouldn’t be able to hear them.

“You need to break up with him.  _ Now.”  _ He hissed.

“What, because you guys didn’t like each other in high school? News flash Ryoma, that was  _ ten years ago.  _ Why can’t you just be happy for me?”

“Why can’t I be happy for you? He’s  _ five years older than you! _ ”

“So what! We’re adults Ryoma, it’s not  _ that  _ big of an age difference!”

“Look, I’ve known him since we were fourteen. He is  _ not  _ going to be good for you!”

“That’s what you say about all of my boyfriends.”

“And have I ever been wrong?!”

“I can’t believe you! You’re such a judgemental dick! You haven’t even spoken to him in a decade, what if he’s changed!”

He had a retort on the tip of his tongue, but at that moment the bedroom door opened and Xander stepped back out. This time he was fully dressed in a plain white button down shirt and a pair of slacks. If Ryoma hadn’t just seen his towel covered boner pressing against his little brother’s ass then he  _ might  _ have thought he looked like a halfway respectable businessman coming home from a casual Friday at the office... But the image was burnt into his retinas, and all he saw was a complete and utter  _ sleaze. _

“I apologize for that.” Xander extended his hand.

He crossed his arms over his chest. No way. No. He was  _ not  _ shaking this man’s hand. His arm hung in the air for a moment before Takumi kicked him in the shin, and he begrudgingly took the proffered hand.

“Not a problem, I should have knocked.” He replied through gritted teeth.

Apparently happy with this semi-civil discourse Takumi went back into the kitchen and finished up cooking. He and Xander sat across from each other at the card table while they waited for the food to be placed on the table. Takumi placed the last serving dish down and kissed his boyfriend -- Gods, Xander was  _ fucking his little brother  _ \-- on the cheek before sitting down. Ryoma rolled his eyes.

“Sorry about the seating arrangements. We were planning on going shopping for a new table this weekend.”

“It’s fine. It’s not your fault.” He turned back to Xander. “So. Windmire. What have you been up to these days.”

He could already hear Takumi’s future lecture being communicated through his glare.

_ Damn it Ryoma, it’s a friendly dinner not a fucking interrogation! _

But that was something he’d worry about in the future. For now, he was going to make this man  _ squirm. _

Xander, to his credit, didn’t seem at all perturbed. “I’ve been working as an accountant, actually.”

An  _ accountant?  _ Gods, what a stiff! That had never been Takumi’s type in the past, what the hell was going on here?

“Make good money?”

_ “Ryoma!”  _ Takumi hissed under his breath.

“Enough to live on.”

“I see…”

They ate in silence, but he couldn’t resist grilling him. This was, apparently, the kind of man his brother was attracted to these days and he was going to do everything in his power as an older brother to quash this while it was still new.

“So how did you two meet?”

“It’s a funny story, actually. My younger sister needed a ride to some teaching convention, so I drove her to the hotel it was at. Did you know it was a three hour drive from here? I can’t believe we not only crossed paths, but ended up being from the same city... Anyways, I was helping her with her bags when I ran into Takumi.”

“He means  _ literally.  _ He couldn’t see where he was going she brought so much stuff.” Takumi rolled his eyes and stuffed a forkful of food into his mouth.

“Precisely. I asked him out, one thing led to another, and the rest is history.”

_ “One thing led to another?” _

“Ryoma! Stop prying!” His little brother’s cheeks were bright red.  _ Apparently  _ they’d had more than just a date. Gods his little brother… Getting lured up to a hotel room by an older man, thrown on the bed and…

_ No. No no no no no! I will  _ not  _ picture that! _

He slammed his fork into his plate. This smug asshole. Xander paused to take a sip of his water.

“So I assume you’ve been tested then?”

The blonde choked, which devolved into a coughing fit. Takumi rubbed his back and shot him a glare.

“Why would you even ask that!”

“What, if he’s going to be  _ one thing led to another- _ ing with you then you deserve to know that you’re going to be safe! Remember what happened with boyfriend number two?”

_ “Ryoma!”  _ Takumi had his fist clenched on top of the table.

Maybe he’d gone too far.

Xander finally recovered from his coughing fit, and he held up a hand to stop Takumi from launching into a tirade.

“Look, I understand. I have younger siblings too, I know how it feels. But…” He took Takumi’s hand gently. He watched his little brother’s expression melt from one of pure rage to one of genuine affection. “I love Takumi. And for his sake, I would like to put the past behind us.”

Well, he sure as hell didn’t like the guy, but Xander really did know how to make him feel like a complete ass. How could he say no when his little brother looked so happy?

“... Fine. But if you hurt him then so help me…”

They finished dinner pretty quickly after that, and in almost complete silence. Xander started clearing the table as soon as they were done, and he collected up his jacket and keys to avoid any further awkwardness between them that night..

Takumi walked him to the door, and just before he stepped out his brother wrapped his arms around his waist. The hair from his ponytail tickled his chin, and he hugged his brother back.

“Thank you, Ryoma. Really.”

“Anything for you, little brother.”

He pulled away, and adopted a stern look.

“But we’re going to talk about that fucking chlamydia comment later.”

Yeah, he probably deserved that lecture.

“You’re right. I’m sorry.”

They exchanged farewells and he tried to resist the urge to ruminate over it as he made his way to the car. His brother. Dating his childhood nemesis. Takumi would probably head back in and kiss him on the cheek, then they’d do dishes side by side in that too tiny kitchen, bumping shoulders and laughing an occasionally kissing, if the mood struck… And he still didn’t approve, not fully…

But hey, he couldn’t be any worse than the last guy, right?

**Author's Note:**

> I decided to do this instead of updating my Leokumi stories. So. Blame Tumblr.


End file.
